i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
they're like a gay fantastic four
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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