we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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