i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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