Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Randomize
