yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
