It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Randomize
