Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
