You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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