i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
