i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
