marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
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