Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize