I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I just want nice things and good sex
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
