Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
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