You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
