hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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