They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
