oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
