All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
