got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
