idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
