Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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