Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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