Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
