im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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