tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
