..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
