The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize