Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
