This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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