i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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