Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
She's JV to your varsity
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
