I wannas sexs uuuuu
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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