i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
