Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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