Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Alive.
So much puke
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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