Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
