We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
They took my balls.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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