Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
