chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
we're making bets on your personal life
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
