so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
