let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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