I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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