If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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