I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize