oh god the rape fog is back!
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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