I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
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