Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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