batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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