i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
